Waiting on the Lord, Part ll

Sometimes (most of the time!) when I am waiting on the Lord, it seems like I am waiting IMPATIENTLY instead of PATIENTLY. It's like I'm telling Him that I'll wait on Him but He'd better be gettin' a move on. I'm waiting for Him to work His will in the lives of the believers but He sure is taking His time about it....I am not quick enough to notice and appreciate His patience with me. I don't seem to expect Him to be patient and longsuffering with others. I forget that the mercy He shows me is also the mercy He shows each and every one of His elect.
All of you who read this blog know of the struggle I have with forgiveness. God has convicted my heart again and again to teach me that I must forgive those who offend me. I finally was able to forgive some longstanding hurts and now that I have reached the other side of that particular struggle, guess what? I have caught myself judging others who are refusing to forgive me and my church family. Praise God for the Holy Spirit! Just when I get to feeling all righteous about FINALLY submitting to God, the Holy Spirit chimes and reminds me how many years I refused to submit to the Lord's calling to forgive. He reminds me that He has done ALL of the work of cleansing my heart of that particular sinful action, that nothing I can do would ever bring me to the point of repentance.
I have been thinking of this a lot because of an upcoming wedding. My dear, dear friend will be there. She has cut off communication with me. I know that my stupid, clumsy actions caused the break. I know that God convicted my heart to say the things I said but now I need to always remember that He uses even our feeble efforts to either bring His elect to Him or drive those away who do not belong to Him. I need to be reminded just how long it took me to come to repentance on the issue of forgiveness and to remember that God is never finished with those who are His elect and called according to His purpose. I need to remember that, as was the case with me, there will be NO rest for those dear ones until they do forgive the offences that happened in the past. My bible says that if I do not forgive my brothers and sisters, I will not be forgiven by my Lord. That scares me. It convicts my heart. It causes me to cry out to my Father, "Please continue the work You have begun in me. Please make me entirely Yours! Please cleanse my heart of all bitterness and hatred and help me to forgive!"
I want to be there with my love and joy shining out of my eyes when God brings those dear ones to repentance. I want to enfold them in my arms and tell them how dearly I love them. I want to see our fellowship restored. However, if this is not God's will for us, I will wait patiently for Him and I will remember that "all things work together for good to those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose". All things, even salvation or destruction are for our good and His glory.
I am excited about this wedding, though the parents of the bride are so angry with our congregation. I pray that it will be a blessed day for them and for their daughter, as our daughter's wedding was for all of us. I hope that God will show me a way through to reconciliation with them. I pray that healing might begin there. But I will wait patiently on the Lord and will be loving and longsuffering through real and imagined slights.
By the way, if you see me railing against someone, remind me of this post!
Till next time....